Fugitives from Fundamentalism

The Musings of Adult Missionary Kids (MKs) & Former Born-Again Believers

The Rapture is nigh

Posted by Ann on May 1, 2010

When I was in middle-school my parents sent my sister and I to an all night moviethon at our church while we were on furlough from the mission field (a one year break spent in the States raising financial support). We brought our sleeping bags and the church provided the popcorn and drinks. It was a “lock-in”, meaning the doors of the church were locked and we were not allowed to leave until the next morning when our parents picked us up. For the next several hours we were subjected to what can only be described as a totally terrifying and gruesome series of movies based on the idea of The Rapture as interpreted from the book of Revelation. In the first movie “A Thief in the Night”, the main character Patty wakes up one morning to find her husband was taken in The Rapture. A government system develops called UNITE that begins requiring people receive “the mark of the beast” in order to use money, or else be arrested. At the end of the movie Patty wakes up from this “dream” only to find The Rapture really did happen overnight.

As the series progressed in the dark auditorium of the church, I’m sure us kids were becoming increasingly frightened by the horror movies, with public guillotine beheadings becoming punishment for refusing to get the mark on your hand or forehead (0110 tattooed three times), different tribulations beginning with the seals being broken, etc.  According to the films, if you did the right, godly thing and became a Christian during this Tribulation time of seven years you could NOT get the mark of the beast or else you’d forfeit your Christianity and become Satan’s (as personified by the Antichrist).

Anyway, here we are, a bunch of kids in a dark church, Clockwork Orangishly being told this is really, seriously going to happen to us if we don’t accept Jesus into our hearts right that moment. Please believe me Jesus, I believe! I was already indoctrinated, but it did serve to keep me in the programming a little longer. My parents and millions of people like them still believe in this nonsense.

Tell me you don’t believe. Tell me 666 is not a scary number! LOL

3 Responses to “The Rapture is nigh”

  1. I keep coming back to the same conclusion when I see stuff like this: you’d have to be the most wide-eyed and uninformed fool to believe in this crap. People flying up into the sky and the beast and all the rest of it!? Jesus, folks, that shit’s not real! Hilarious video though. The results of earnest belief in the supernatural are always funny (except when they lead to war and discrimination and hatred, etc). It’s sad that these folks can’t see how brain-washy “lock-ins” are.

  2. JN said

    That movie looks creepy. The “thief in the night” metaphor is an interesting one. It seems disturbing for believers and non-believers alike. Who (or what) is the thief in the night? The Sunday school answer is cut and dry: the Day of the Lord. But I’m not sure that should give believers a warm and fuzzy feeling.

    Amos 5:18-20

    “Woe to you who long
    for the day of the Lord!
    Why do you long for the day of the Lord?
    That day will be darkness, not light.
    It will be as though a man fled from a lion
    only to meet a bear,
    as though he entered his house
    and rested his hand on the wall
    only to have a snake bite him.
    Will not the day of the Lord be darkness, not light—
    pitch-dark, without a ray of brightness?”

    If you put together a list of references about similar uses of the thief in the night metaphors, I bet you’d find it being a lot less positive and much more confusing than most Christians make it out to be. It’d be a good project for a theology student who is looking to fail a class.

    • Ann said

      Yeah, who wants some guy breaking into your house while you’re asleep at night? I’m so disturbed I think I’ll develop my life around that fear and pray every day for my safety and the safety of my loved ones. That won’t cause any paranoia or anything in my life.

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