Fugitives from Fundamentalism

The Musings of Adult Missionary Kids (MKs) & Former Born-Again Believers

Satire

Why I Am a Christian

My walk with the Lord Jesus Christ started in Sunday School when I was five years old. It’s been an incredible ride since then! The Chaplain was a friend of mine in high school, and we have had many discussions about why he lost his faith in the one true God. In our discussions, I let him know that I love Him with the love that can come only from Christ, and I want him to be with me in heaven. I pray for him daily. As part of our discussions, I created a manifesto of sorts to explain why it IS rational to believe in a realm outside of the natural world we see with our eyes. The Chaplain asked if he could post my reasons for believing as way of showing what intelligent, rational Christians believe and why they believe it. I hope that you can see the Truth shine through my list below. May Christ use it as a tool to touch the hearts of those who have been misled by Satan’s lies and the false beauty of sin!

1. Tradition: Belief in the spiritual realm and in the divinity of Jesus Christ has been good enough for millions upon millions of believers for over 2000 years. If those people, our parents, family and friends believe, then who are we to question it? I know that non-believers would probably argue that any attempt to appeal to the past and tradition in an effort to superimpose the past on the present is invalid, since not everyone shares the same past. For instance, non-believers would probably argue that the pro-slavery South made the same argument: “Slavery has always existed, it is in the Bible, and if it was good enough for them, it is good enough for us.” However, non-believers are missing a key point. Namely, they fail to recognize that slavery was actually a good thing in Biblical times. It was a way to escape from poverty, and I think we can all agree that poverty is much worse than slavery. What is freedom compared to money? Without money there is no freedom. Further, slavery in the South was bad. It involved a lot of whipping, raping, tearing apart of families, etc. In Biblical times, whippings and rapings by the owners would have occurred less often, since those slaves were owned by God’s chosen people. I don’t think God wanted gentiles to own slaves. However, the Israelites were His anointed ones; their slaves would have been treated better than modern-day Christians in America are. In the end, tradition is the way to go. When tradition gets overturned, chaos results. This is why so many of us Christians are conservative Republicans. This Christian political party wants to keep things the way they are now (in cases where things are already good) or they try to return us to the way things were in the past (in cases where things are bad: things like modern-day secularism, giving Hinduism & other cultures’ false-prophet, Satan-led religions equal standing with Christianity, etc.); they understand the value of tradition.

2. God’s nation: It is obvious to me and a lot of other very intelligent people who are Christians, that the United States is the modern world’s “Chosen Nation” and Americans are the modern equivalent of the “Chosen People” of God. Evidence for this can be seen in the fact that we accepted Jesus while the Jews did not. This allowed us to supplant the Jews as God’s chosen people. Secondary signs of our status as a blessed nation are as follows: we have more money and a higher standard of living than other countries–God’s doing. We spend a lot of this money we have on our military and it shows; we have the biggest and most powerful military in the world–God’s doing. Our country’s leaders (used to be) self-confessed servants of the Lord, and they had been placed in charge of the most powerful nation in the world to carry out His will–God’s doing. I think the evidence is self-evident. If you need more proof, look at regions of the world where Christianity does not have a strong foothold. For instance, look at Africa. Our parents worked as missionaries there for a reason. If more people in Africa would embrace the Lord Jesus Christ, they would be much more prosperous and their countries would be powerful like the U.S. God rewards those who worship Him.

3. Common sense: I drive a car to work everyday; someone made that car. I look at the world each day; someone had to have made the world. Humans are incapable of creating worlds; ergo, someone more powerful than a human made the world. The most prosperous and mighty nation on the Earth is overwhelmingly Christian; therefore, the Christian God is the True God and He made the world. Gods of other religions are not true gods, since they believe strange and very silly things that Christianity does not. Christianity is obviously true when compared to other religions, because other religions are just so obviously weird. An elephant for a deity, really? Don’t make me laugh. My God is not an animal, and He is a powerful God: Jesus was/is able to defy the laws of gravity, can modify the properties of water to walk on it, and can alter the medical conditions of the sick and disabled through mind-powers alone. And this is just one manifestation of God! We still have the other two parts of God to go (but that doesn’t mean we have three gods, just that God has three parts ‘ sort of like I have different parts to my body. The trinity can be tricky to wrap your head around. Think about your own body: it has a head, torso and limbs. We have a mind, body and soul. Most things come in threes, and this is because God’s creation is a reflection of His own nature. God doesn’t have a body, unless He chooses to take one on, but the analogy still works). Father God and the Holy Spirit can do even more amazing things: stop the sun in the sky, impregnate a woman without having a penis or sperm, flood the whole earth, create worlds and pretty much do whatever he wants with what He/They created.

4. Morals: Without absolute morals, based on rules created by and handed down by the Creator of the world, there would be utter chaos in the world. Evidence for this can be seen in parts of the world that do not or did not have Christianity: they have and had no morals. That is why they aren’t as prosperous as the U.S. and why they are always at war and in poverty. Also, if there were no God, people who hurt and kill others and get away with it would never be punished. Good always conquers evil, so there must be a final reckoning to even things out sometime (even if it ends up being in the spiritual realm after death).

5. Natural Law: The world acts in uniform ways (revolving planets, gravity, etc.). Someone had to have created that uniformity, since uniformity is so uniform. Uniformity is obviously created, and doesn’t exist on its own. Therefore, someone caused things to be uniform.

6. Feeling God: When I go to church on Wednesdays and Sundays, I can FEEL that God is real (and that He is the God of the Bible). I just know it is true because I feel it and I believe it. It’s as if, when I sing a worship hymn, that I can feel the power of the Holy Spirit filling my body and giving me peace and healing. I wouldn’t feel that way if God wasn’t real and if I wasn’t worshiping the right God. Hindus don’t feel that kind of energy, healing and peace when they worship Ganesh. At least, I don’t think so. I haven’t really asked any Hindus, but I know I’m right because I can feel it.

7. Answers: I believe in God and in His Son, Jesus Christ, because it gives me answers. If I wasn’t a Christian, I wouldn’t know why humans exist, who created the world, what I’m supposed to do with my life, what rules I should follow, what behavior I should condemn or praise, who I should vote for, why I should bother getting out of bed in the morning, etc. Non-believers don’t have any of these answers. They have no meaning to their lives. Really, it surprises me that they don’t just commit suicide, if they really believe that we are animals like apes and opossums. What’s the point of living, if you don’t have the answers to life and don’t know what the meaning of life is?

8. Evidence: God answers my prayers everyday, and I have lots of friends who experience the same thing. Atheists, of course, have an excuse for this evidence as well. They use terms from psychology like cognitive dissonance and confirmation bias ‘ these are just ideas that people who have hardened their hearts to Christ come up with to complicate what is obvious and common sense: when you pray for something and it comes true, then obviously someone had to have answered the prayer! It doesn’t take a lot of thought folks. Evidence for God is out there if you just open your eyes to little things: traffic clearing up so you can pick up your kids on time, a phone call from a friend that makes you feel better, etc. Things like that don’t happen to non-believers, I don’t think.

9. Christ’s Holy Character: Even non-believers will usually admit that Jesus was the most moral person who ever walked the earth. I have heard SOME people dispute this though. An agnostic friend of mine once told me that Lao-tse and Buddha preached the “turn the other cheek” message at least 500 years before Christ. I don’t know about all that. Anyway, those Eastern religions all worship false gods, so the point is irrelevant. My friend also tried to claim that practicing Christians don’t follow the turn the other cheek message. He tried to claim that politically speaking, Christians were some of the most hawkish, violence-supporting people in the country. It’s amazing what liberals can make themselves believe. I think Bush was chosen directly by God, and I agreed with him when he said, “I just want you to know that, when we talk about war, we’re really talking about peace.”

My friend also tried to claim that most Christians don’t live their lives according to Christ’s commandment “Judge not lest ye be judged” (my friend claimed that the Christian belief that non-believers will burn in Hell for all eternity is a “judgment.” Yes, I have a lot of patience when it comes to my friend. As you might be able to tell, he has a lot of arrogance, as most non-believers do. He also mentioned two other commandments: “Give to him that asketh of thee, and from him that would borrow of thee turn not thou away,” and “If thou wilt be perfect, go and sell that which thou hast, and give to the poor.” My friend claimed that conservative politics is fixated on greed and on keeping “one’s money all for oneself.” He thinks that the conservative disdain for giving “handouts” to undeserving and lazy poor people is “anti-Christian.” I explained to him that he was taking things entirely too literally. I explained that a Christian’s most important job is to lead a moral life and to tell others about Christ so they can avoid eternal punishment in Hell. I don’t know that I convinced him, but his heart has been pretty hardened to the message of the Lord.

Getting back to the main point: Christ was definitely the most perfect human to have ever walked the Earth. He was the most moral and preached a message of pure love. There is no more perfect message than telling people to love one’s neighbor as oneself. The agnostic friend I just mentioned, when I pointed to Christ’s message of pure love and His perfection as a human, tried to point to what he saw as evidence of a lack of love or of imperfection. He claimed that Christ thought His second coming would happen before the deaths of the majority of the disciples. He mentioned a few verses that he claims prove this. I can only remember two of them, “Ye shall not have gone over the cities of Israel till the Son of Man be come,” and “There are some standing here which shall not taste death until the Son of Man comes into His kingdom.” Even Satan can make the scriptures mean what he wants and that interpretation is obviously wrong, since Jesus was never wrong.

My friend also pointed to a poll showing that 25% of the U.S. population thinks that Jesus will return during their lifetimes; he tried to use this as evidence of what he called the “deluded” nature of Christian beliefs. Obviously, this poll was in no way connected to Jesus, and it certainly wasn’t connected to His status as a perfect human being (I let him know as much).

Just to help illustrate the weakness of the non-believers argument that Christ wasn’t the most perfect human ever, let me mention one other point made by my friend. He tried to suggest that Socrates was more moral than Christ. He tried to claim that Socrates couldn’t have cared less when people disagreed with him, but that Christ was full of an angry belief in eternal punishment and had nothing but disgust and disdain for those who disagreed with Him. My friend pointed to this verse Jesus addressed to people who didn’t like His preaching: “Ye serpents, ye generation of vipers, how can ye escape the damnation of hell.” I had to admit that it wasn’t the most loving way to put it, but that Christ is God and He would know whether they had viper-like hearts or not. It’s not for us to try to judge the goodness of Christ. The Bible tells us that He was the only perfect person, so we know that it is true. This automatically means that any evidence to the contrary is being incorrectly interpreted.

Of course, my friend had a lot of other verses that he claimed proved the “less-than-stellar morality of Jesus,” as he put it. For instance, the one where people should cut their hands off, the time Jesus killed a bunch of pigs by sending demons into them (my friend thought the Son of God could have sent them anywhere), the time He cursed a fig tree (my friend tried to convince me that this took place during a time of the year in which fig trees were not producing figs). I tried my best to be a good witness and explain to him that these events were significant for their larger symbolic messages, but he was hearing none of it.

Sorry to have gone on for so long, but it looks like a lot of other people on this blog have that same tendency. Anyway, so the above explains why I am convinced of the existence of the Christian God and of the divinity of His Son, Jesus, my Lord and Master! Blessings.

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2 Responses to “Satire”

  1. Brandt said

    Excellent list of reasons proving Christianity true. I like #6 best, because personally one of the most obvious proofs of God’s existence is the fact that I experience Him all the time, and so do tons of other believers. There’s no way all of us could be mistaken.

    Aside from all the other excellent reasons, let me also add that the Bible says God is real and that God created the world in six days. Since the Bible is inspired of God (2 Tim. 3:16) and inerrant, it’s the only source of truth to help us know the meaning of life. People who ignore God’s Word are just foolish.

    Praise God.

    Brandt

  2. Ann said

    One of my favorite things you’ve written for this site. Been meaning to tell you.

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